aluzar: переводы

→I figured that if i was casr into the firey lake, then god will have done everything in his power to save me. During judgement, none of the bad things i had done were even mentioned. Not even the time i squashed over 50 snails with a hammer. Rather, he only told everyone how brave i was. Then i walked through clouds and drank from rivers of milk. This was special milk, in that it didnt give me diarrea. Oh yes, and there are guppies here. Millions of them! They fly all around your head singing all the while. When i introduce myself to these heavenly guppies... They recognized me as the half-brother of Waffle. I asked one of them how all of guppies knew who Waffle was. I ate the guppie before he could answer.