Апокалипсис после нас / Apocalypse After Us: Prologue: Dusty

I was so tired.

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 18:11

Every night I kept waking up in a cold sweat, feeling my sore muscles and as the broken springs in my bed made my spine ache. Sure, I could have asked somepony to go to any spare room and drag an undamaged bed for me, but...

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 20:50

I just did not want it.

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 18:11

The cool dry air from the vent above blew my coat, forcing me to huddle myself even more in the already cold room.

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 20:59

The faster concrete walls of this place emptied, the harder they weighed down upon my mind. Before, there were about fifty inhabitants in this part of the block. Now it was just me and the echo ringing out here every night at the same time as I made my way towards the powder room.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 08:09

Only few places in the block had functioning lamps. The locals had to replace burnt-out ones with whatever they could—or, to be more specific, with old incandescent light bulbs produced in Stalliongrad. They were large and shone very brightly. And they were sort of nice warmers in the absence of central heating.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 08:25

I had decided to take a different path; thankfully, nopony paid attention to what a lone mare was doing here.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 08:31

I had replaced the lamps in my residential part with twinkling fairy lights. The illumination they provided was poor, but lovely.

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 21:13

Reaching out my hoof in the half-light, I felt the cold metal of a tap. There were two taps, but I never noticed the difference between them as both gave me clean ice-cold water. I had no idea why the water pipe in this place had been working so far. Maybe they just forgot to redirect water to some other place, or maybe they just did not want to see us more often than they had to. Who knew? I was happy we still had water in our rooms and fresh food in the cafeteria.

psychoshy 18.07.18 в 14:24

I was also fond of the fact that no-one came to see me. Even though I did not like loneliness, it was the most preferable choice now.

psychoshy 24.04.18 в 22:04

I took a half-empty bottle of medical alcohol from under a sink and poured a little bit over an old dirty handkerchief which I used as a rag to wipe the mirror.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 00:22

The mirror was always clean. But just as I ran the rag over the smooth surface, I felt a bit calmer. Perhaps I was going crazy. Or had already lost my mind over the past year. I did not know.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 00:23

After cleaning the mirror, I returned everything to its place. I put the plastic bottle under the sink and threw the rag on its edge, just to be able to repeat the entire process again next night.

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 21:24

When I put my hoof under ice water, I felt for some reason only how badly I was tired, the feeling instantly sweeping over me. Anyway, it would be no more the moment I went back to bed.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 00:40

I finished washing and hastily wiped my face with a piece of a velvet curtain, once hung in a cinema hall and used by me for all manner of things, then made my way to a workshop, which was that very cinema hall.

psychoshy 28.05.18 в 00:08

And I could not help but feel that I was not alone tonight.

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 07:51

[hr]

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 18:12

Today the cafeteria was less crowded than yesterday. Two or three ponies were out of sight. I did not know them, but I could work out how many ponies were left in the block.

psychoshy 29.05.18 в 00:28

Where once were five hundred ponies, now it was only eleven left. Except those who had already been off for their rooms, I saw eight or nine in the cafeteria. I was not counting myself; in fact, I did not even exist in a formal sense. Few ponies remembered me here. Maybe somepony in another block, but... Who cared?

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 21:39

Today they served the same thing as yesterday. As the day before yesterday. As the day before the day before yesterday…

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 21:44

I stared at my tasteless Shangai cabbage. Tough like rubber and smelling like old socks. Yum yum.

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 20:55

The remaining ponies dined at the last of long tables, which all had been brought outside and adapted to the needs of the community. There was never any talking or even chewing noises during lunch, breakfast or dinner. The dead silence, bereaved even of the scratching of spoons and forks on ceramic bowls, hung over the cafeteria just as in every corner of the three-storey block. Each of those who sat here tried to eat his portion as quickly as he could and crawl back into his quiet private space, hiding away from the others. Somepony spent his time scrabbling strange philosophical monologues about the meaning of life on the walls, somepony tried to make something useful—like a boiler for example, to make at least one tap stream hot water. Otherwise, you always had to heat water up, but the voltage was applied only on certain days, usually in three or four hours at night. Of course, you might be satisfied with cold baths, but anypony would agree that it was quite unpleasant.

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 17:24

There always was nothing to do. I used to have a friend who brought books. Lots of books. But it was so long ago…

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:01

However, he was not the only one who brought me something. Cans of paint, brushes or something like that would appear near the far wall every time they brought us food. The most important thing was to make sure that it appeared as if by chance without attracting anypony's attention, even if others were absolutely indifferent.

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 19:20

Usually I left a note where I wrote about what I needed. And usually it was brought to me. The half-empty cans with remains of paint on the bottom, the dried-up brushes which I had to soak in a solvent for a long time, the different fabrics (sometimes in the pretty good condition and untouched by moths) and stuff like that.

psychoshy 25.04.18 в 04:51

I needed all of these. Had I already mentioned that it was a terribly boring place?

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 20:58

[hr]

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 18:12

"...'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub!"

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:13

A creak of the door came from the auditorium, making me bounce back towards the dressing room. The moment I managed to make out a pony that in the dark looked like a stallion, I was glad I did not grease the door hinges.

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 19:58

Before the stranger who, like a bolt of the blue, had emerged here late at night could shout something to me, I was already barricading in the dressing room as I tore off my homespun dress. I myself sewed it from different fabrics: some part of it was the velvet curtains of the cinema hall, which was also a theatre at the same time, some part the denim which had once been a pair of old jeans. A stench of engine oil and petrol as well as a slight smell of bedbugs stank out the entire affair.

If it was one of the ponies I thought of, my barricade in the form of the old latch would not keep him out for long. However, it would not take me too long either. I just needed to change into more decent clothes.

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 20:16

My night visitor did not start to break down the heavy metal door, but instead loudly knocked three times. How odd. "I didn't mean to interrupt you!" he cried. "It's just—"

psychoshy 29.05.18 в 00:35

"What are you doing here at two o'clock?!" The dress was a miserable sight now: all ragged, crumpled. I had spent a whole week making it to match my role somehow, but now...

psychoshy 29.05.18 в 00:41

I thought I was growling in anger. But the pony who came here certainly did not hear it. "Well, I could ask the same question to you!..."

psychoshy 29.05.18 в 00:44

"Take five steps from the door!" I cried to him and slightly opened the door. The stranger had really moved away; it seemed to be more than five steps, actually. The space was lit only by candles placed on the stage and a kerosene lamp inside the dressing room, but the latter was now behind me and did not allow me to see the face of the visitor. He could not see mine either. "For the love of goddesses, don't you shout. Are you new here?"

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 21:06

"Excuse me dear, Miss! I'm very sorry, I swear," he lowered his voice to a half-whisper. "I just have been watching you for a while—"

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:34

"You're stalking me!" I hissed.

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:18

"No no, why would I!" he began making excuses. "I just live next to you, it's a couple of rooms over there."

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:21

"It doesn't change anything! Besides, you owe me a new dress!"

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:23

"Speaking of your dress!" The pony immediately dragged in a new topic. "It's amazing! I mean, to sew stage clothes from such materials and to make it look like the one worn by…"

psychoshy 24.04.18 в 20:57

What a flatterer. I did not mind him going on. After all, there was nothing wrong with me standing here in a dark hall at night and listening to praise from a perfect stranger, yes?

psychoshy 24.04.18 в 21:13

"Your acting is not bad, I must say."

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:25

"[i]Not bad[/i]?" I felt offended for some reason. Very offended!

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:27

"Well, you see, you still have not enough charisma for the role. You're a mare while it is supposed to be played by a stallion. However, you have played very well for a mare, let me tell you! Even the grim is fitting!"

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:37

"How long have you stood there?" I pulled up the lamp to me and slowly began to work around the pony, trying to keep him within eyesight. The stranger stayed in the shadows, apparently afraid of showing something. "An hour? Two? You know, it's very improper to stand and stare at a defenseless lonely mare who tries to play one of the great and eternal classical monologues so late."

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 21:27

"Mea culpa. But..." He made a step forward, so the light of the lamp allowed me to make out only the outline of his body. "I just couldn't interrupt something so lovely."

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 21:41

The exit now was behind my tail. My night visitor seemed to be aware of this and was trying to hold me somehow a little longer before I could vanish in the darkness. I did not know why he had decided to engage with me—but, frankly speaking, I did not want to know. Now I would have to look for some new place thanks to him, and I was not very happy about it. "Lovely?"

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 21:50

"It is a rare thing to see somepony doing something with such dedication..."

psychoshy 17.04.18 в 21:29

Oh, he was a rascal indeed. But what flattery! what horrid and terrible and loathsomely bloated, all-embracing, of a truly cosmic scale—flattery! What immoral and wicked pony one must have been to use flattery when conversing with a mare who had spent six months without any conversations! He literally forced me to stop dead and listen to him! My hatred was immense!

psychoshy 21.10.18 в 21:42

"Look, I know you have no reason to listen to me and talk to me, but... Maybe I can earn your trust somehow."

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 21:58

"Why would you want my trust? It's the first time we have met. The first and the last, luckily to us both." I had to keep it together and resist his cheap tricks. For you know what would happen next? First we were to start talking, then to visit each other, then to become friends... Bleurgh!

psychoshy 22.04.18 в 22:00