Звездопад / Starfall: Глава 18

Chapter 18

Camrad_RIP 17.07.23 в 13:33

* * *

Camrad_RIP 17.07.23 в 13:33

Taer didn't quite know where she was or what her body was doing. She was in an endless Fenot delirium. Reality trembled, moving around her and scattering under her gaze, splitting into thousands of variations as if in a kaleidoscope. Was she talking to someone? At least she could hear her voice, calm and confident, without a shadow of the panic, terror, and hopelessness that had consumed her as she struggled inside her own body.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:02

// Why? Why didn't I trust my intuition then?" she repeated for the umpteenth time.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:03

Then, on the beach, she felt the homing activation, everything suddenly threatening: the cocktail glass, the servant, the droid next to her, the sea. She even knew what the guider was going to do. Shove the cocktail glass in the servant's face, and topple the chaise lounge table so she could get away from the sea and run. Run towards the villa, where the weapons were left.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:04

Of course, she decided this was another attack of aggression, a manifestation of the beginning of madness. Instead of acting, she forcibly held herself in the chair, sipping her cocktail with defiant calm. The realization that this servant was not among those presented to her on arrival came too late.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:06

Taer didn't know what was in that shot, but now there was always "her" presence around her. A steady, powerful, chilling stream filled almost all of her consciousness. More powerful than anything she'd experienced under the Fenote, it squeezed Taer, helpless to resist, to the very back of her mind, occasionally overwhelming her with waves of strange images and fragments of other people's memories, so similar to the nightmares that followed the activation of the guider.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:08

But Taer knew what to do. She waited, concentrating all her remaining willpower on not drowning in despair or disintegrating under the waves of the other's memory. She waited for the icy flood to subside and for the 'other' to fall asleep, making room for her. Taer didn't know why, but when faced with monotony and boringness, the "other" weakened, the icy stream thinned, and she retreated, either falling asleep or tired. It had happened twice before. The first time, not for long, while she was still in the clinic where she was kept. The second time was while driving the flyer, which was enough for her to contact the lord and even get to the tower, but then... Then her emotions took over, just as they had the first time when she found herself over the agonizing body of the SS interrogator.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:17

// The girl fell apart." -The "other" commented, and to Taer's surprise, she told the lord anyway. - "Well, that's okay." she reassured herself mentally. - "I won't fall apart this time. I know what to do."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:18

She didn't know how long it took, but gradually reality stopped fracturing under her gaze, shrinking to its natural uniformity. The icy stream in her head subsided, and Taer finally regained control of her body, finding herself in an unfamiliar place.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:20

It was an apartment of some kind. Judging by the furnishings of the small room painted by the holo system, it was a bourgeois apartment, probably intended for rent. The only window at the end of the room was matte white and gave no clues as to its location.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:30

Taher sat on the couch. A large metal bowl stood on the long, low table in front of her. The kind meant for picking up salads. Empty, except for the towel she'd thrown in it. Beside the bowl was her activated infoblock, with a holo-screen with a summary of hyperspace conditions between Fyron and the Сapital.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:32

// Calculating hyper transition time? ". - Taer frowned, trying to focus her unruly eyes on the screen.- "Without an assistance droid? No wonder she fell asleep..."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:33

On the screen, for some reason, there was information on the available low orbital locations in the capital, but Taer wasn't interested in that, nor was she interested in where the two doors in the room she was in led to, why she was wearing a strict business dress and not a tunic. Nothing interested her at all. What mattered was that she saw the blaster on her belt with the weapon lying in an open pouch near the desk.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:34

// I won't fall apart this time." - She said in her mind, pulling her blaster out of its holster, her arms felt like cotton as if she'd gotten used to her own body. -"It doesn't matter anymore..."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:35

The blaster's grip felt heavy in her palm, and Taer sighed and pointed the black muzzle at her face. It was so close that she could make out the glinting of the focusing crystal at the bottom:

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:35

// This is so stupid...". She felt the tears start to come and took another deep breath to calm the pent-up emotions. "Don't fall apart," she commanded herself.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 12:36

With a quiet click, the ready lever lowered, and with a barely audible clink, the drives went into "combat":

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:06

// It's better like that than to be caged inside my own body, powerless. Than to be a monster.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:07

A lump came up in her throat. She clearly didn't have much time left. Taer sighed as if she were taking a long dive and pressed the trigger.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:08

An icy torrent surged through her mind but immediately receded as if purposely leaving room for her as well :

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:09

"No, no, no, my dear." She heard her voice. "That's no good. It's my body too."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:10

Her eyes opened and she saw the blaster still pointed at her face. Her finger was still on the trigger, and Taer tried hard to press it, but she couldn't. The wall of another will she had been helplessly beating against once again became a prisoner in her own body.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:15

"You can't be left alone even for a second..." the "other" sighed. "And of course, the tears..." she added reproachfully, and literally without noticing Taer's resistance, she put the blaster away, removing the battle-ready lever.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:16

"Tears are not compatible with good eyeliner." She instructed calmly, waving her palm slowly over her eyes to dry the tears. "Except in certain cases, when you need to look particularly pathetic. But that's not part of the plan, is it?"

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:18

Her hands pulled a makeup kit out of her bag, and after quickly blotting the corners of her eyes with a tampon, she moved on to an eyeliner pencil.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:18

Taer mentally howled in frustration, trying to regain control of her own body. She was ready to claw at her face to break free of the cage but to no avail. She was sinking back into the nightmare. Becoming a blank stare.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:20

"By the way." In the meantime, the "other" continued, doing something with a pencil near her eye, not needing the help of a mirror at all. "The angle you chose for the shot is not a good idea. From that angle, you'd just rip your face open, getting a dozen minutes of agony in the darkness and maybe a few dozen days of disgrace if someone capable of first aid is around. For a truly instant kill with a blaster, you have to shoot it in the eye. The explosive vaporization of the fluid filling the eyeball will cause fatal brain trauma, even if it isn't hit by the main discharge. Or to the temporal lobe, if the blaster is powerful enough." She added, setting the cosmetic bag aside and switching the holo-screen of the infoblock to mirror mode.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:22

A confident, stylishly dressed woman with impeccable makeup looked back at her from the mirror with a condescending smile, almost like a stranger. Taer didn't recognize herself in her. Clearly not a noblewoman, but rather a very successful and high-ranking businesswoman from the corporate world.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:23

"Well, that's different." She smiled contentedly, looking at her reflection. "And you were going to kill this nice woman? Just like that?" Her reflection shook its head disapprovingly. "Your bloodthirstiness is beginning to worry me."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:24

// - "Lying, self-righteous creature." Taer thought angrily. She rarely discerned the thoughts of the other, but she could feel her presence, her emotions, her moods. And she remembered the hunger, the thirst, the thrill of killing. Even the memory of it made Taer feel sick. -"You're the one who likes to kill."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:26

The 'other', on the other hand, was clearly discerning her thoughts well:

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:29

"That's just your interpretation." The one in the reflection waved it away. "However, at your level of logic, you could say that I like to kill people. And you make it sound negative, but is that a bad thing? Loving your job? After a certain level, you can only improve if you really love what you do."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:31

Taer couldn't tell if the 'other' was serious or just mocking. The ice stream in her mind was calm and serene, as it was most of the time.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:32

// Killing people is a job? It's disgusting.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:32

"Why such rejection?" The other raised her eyebrows in surprise. "In all complex human societies, there is a stratum that specializes in killing people. And it's usually a highly respected stratum, firstly because it's a highly demanded task, and secondly..." She smiled meaningfully, "Because it's prudent. And it's all the more strange when the rejection comes from someone who, on the surface level of logic, was trying her best to be part of the hereditary military aristocracy. You're a prude, Taer."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:34

// It's not the same. Knights are the first and foremost defenders of the House...

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:36

"Is that so?" The "other" asked, pulling out a glass cylinder with a metal lid, like the ones used to store specimens, from a bag near the table. The cylinder was filled with a thick, transparent liquid, with a whitish lump of flesh floating inside. "A rather naive way of looking at things."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:45

She carefully placed the cylinder in the bottom of a metal bowl on the table and covered it with a towel.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:45

"But even so." She continued. "I fit your ideal quite well. I protected the lord, and I protected you. Killing when necessary."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:47

// You didn't just kill. You abused, you tortured, you purposely caused suffering, you dismembered..." - Taer listed, and every vestige of her shuddered at the memory, literally sick with revulsion.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:48

"You mean the interrogation?" The other one thought, absent-mindedly running her fingernail over her lips. Taer only now noticed that she had long, carefully manicured fingernails covered with pearlescent nail polish in a false pattern. "Well, it's a military necessity. I did what I could to get the most information in the least amount of time. Or are you talking about what came afterward?" She suddenly perked up, and her smile became eerily predatory. "That was indeed somewhat extravagant." The one in the reflection laughed, gracefully covering her mouth with her palm like a socialite. "But it was your wish, and I just decided to pamper you. Have you forgotten?"

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:53

Taer suddenly remembered lying there, unable to move, in absolute darkness:

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:53

"Altered structures, symbiotes, artificial organs, and exotissue kits." Enumerated a gruff, irritated voice from above. "We must wait for a full miscalculation. It's too dangerous otherwise. This isn't human. It's a veritable exhibition of advanced biotechnology. If it's even human." The voice added uncertainly. "And not a chimera."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:55

"Yes?" The other voice inquired lazily, and Taer felt the stranger's hand touch her skin in a masterly way, running up her stomach to her chest. "It looks very human..."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:57

// He... He touched me." Taer remembered her impotent rage at someone touching her helpless body. How she had mentally wriggled, trying to move at least, and swore to herself, going mad with rage, that she would rip the bastard's arm off and make him eat it...

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:59

"What a creep." Smiled condescendingly at her reflection. "Well, he got what he deserved, then. Maybe you should be a little grateful to your protector."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 13:59

// I...I didn't want to. Taer objected hesitantly, realizing that it was nothing. She wanted to, very much so.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 14:01

"You mean there will be no thanks?" The "other" rolled her eyes. "Always the story," she sighed sadly, "services already rendered are worthless."

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 14:16

I, uh, wanted this. Taer admitted with difficulty. But it was emotion, and it was wrong, nasty.

Camrad_RIP 21.07.23 в 14:17