Мы строим деревню / we are building ecovillage: мужское и женское

Male and female

ivanovishe 22.11.13 в 20:05

The wives followed the Decembrists to Siberia...

pakuleva 07.12.13 в 15:17

and ruined their penal servitude.

pakuleva 07.12.13 в 15:21

Folklore

pakuleva 07.12.13 в 15:21

Remember, I promised to tell you about a family unanimity, i.e. about a concordance of a male and a female in the question of moving from a city to mountains? It is the time.

vladvic 13.12.13 в 19:40

In one summer here was Tobi, the austrian student, who came to Russia within the students exchange program. Tobi is a carpenter, very hard-working and good fellow. We communicated and worked together a lot - mounted the lags for the floor. I asked him: "Why do you like living in Russia?" Tobi said, that we had everybody on their places: women are women, and men are men. Everybody do their own work in their own roles. I was a bit surprised: "Is it not so in Austria?" "No, well if I said there anything like that I'd be called a sexist and nobody talked to me. We have no division of labour, we can have men and women at a building site, as well as in the kitchen. Then, for some reason, I was glad for my country, in which everybody is in his place. And thoughts are coming into my head that the more we live in a traditional society, the more clear becomes this sexual division of labour. Earlier, when the people lived in caves, this differentiation perhaps was even more obvious.

vladvic 13.12.13 в 19:54

In country it's still clear: the man is: firewood, building, maintenance, defence, hunting, fishing. The woman is: children, house, food, clothes, ordering, kitchen garden... The man obtains resources, and the woman processes them, redistributes, develops. The man brings water in buckets, and the woman uses this water for food, laundering; the man brings firewood, and the woman controls how much heat she wants from the furnace; the man brings a bag of potatoes, and the woman decides what to make out of it.

vladvic 13.12.13 в 20:00

Single persons or incomplete families. Existing people have to take the missing role. A woman brings water, splits firewoods, or a man does everything by himself. Of course it's possible, it happens everywhere, especially in our modern industrial society, in which all resources narrow down to money: you don't have to work physically, you can do whatever you can do and don't think about what will grow up in your kitchengarden, who will bring firewood and water. You have only one resource which easily transforms to everything: heat, shelter, food, etc. In this situation gender division of labour doesn't have such meaning as in traditional society. And the more industrial, money-oriented the society is, the less it has man/woman roles.

vladvic 13.12.13 в 20:07

No matter how have we been living earlier but after the moving to the nature we start willing or not to create very definite roles in the family, it becomes a daily living need. It seems like some instincts which can sleep during the life in the city wake up. And there is a suspicion that the return to the natural clear roles is very important for the family living naturally. Both for the survival and for the normal comfortable life.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:21

What concerns seasons in the village, the summer undoubtedly is more female time (but it is not about the period of making, when there are a lot of building works, which mostly take place in summer time). The winter is male time. In summer there is no need for man to hug so much water and firewood. In winter the man traditionally takes upon himself most part of work in the house. It is good to understand that.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:29

What concerns male and female roles in the process of moving to the settlement and in general in the decision taking, there also are some patterns. Either it happens according joint desire and joint readiness or this idea ruins. It is difficult for a woman to survive in the settlement by herself, just as for a man too. It is also very difficult to find the “spouse” if you already live in the settlement, at least because the circle of contacts confines and there is no way to choose. Then in the Internet on different subject settlements forums begins active and not very perspective search for the partners, various marriage meetings are organized, where the “spouses” must come across with each other. But there is no guarantee that it will happen.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:49

I think that the most right way is to move when you are already married couple. And if both partners are agree and ready. Then they have fewer questions further.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:32

It happens that some potential settlers complain that their spouses don’t share their dreams about “forest” life. The variant: “ My wife will never agree to live in the forest, but I want it very much”. Or another one: “I buy some hectares of virgin lands now, built there a hut on the sly, and my wife immediately will understand her love towards the ecological life and we`ll move there”, but suddenly it doesn’t work. I have a question: who did choose this wife (or husband)? You should gain an understanding of your own criteria of what is important in your partner, because sometimes they find the wife at the disco, in an expensive restaurant and then they are surprised, why she doesn’t want to live in the forest and been occupied with handraise.

Yanne 02.04.14 в 15:39

Here it's like in the medicine - on all cabinets with drugs there is a clear and very useful text: "Watch what you're taking". This phrase should be inscribed in all civilian registry offices of the country, broadcast it in all media, and probably there would be less questions regarding the family life.

vladvic 02.04.14 в 15:45

From the other hand this is also the issue about unclear role position in the family. The man shows the direction and the woman fills this direction with her energy and supports her husband, on conditions that he fulfills his function well: provides the wife with resources, gives her the clear direction and safety. If a woman starts choosing the direction where the family should go on her own, this means that she starts drawing the functions which are not properly done by her husband, or she is too “manly”. It is again about the sex differentiation in the family.

Yanne 03.04.14 в 16:23

In other words if all roles are clear: the man is the man, and the woman is the woman, the main decision in such conditions belongs to the man. If he is ready, he is self-confident then the move will happen. Because of it, probably, I narrate for myself to a greater extent. For the man, that is to say.

Yanne 03.04.14 в 16:28

The main idea: the life in traditional natural conditions is the big challenge and the checking of male-female relationships both inside the person and in their family.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:52

I had written this and began to hesitate. Asked Natalia what she thinks about that. She said: “If you were not so sure in the moving I would go nowhere”.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:56

Just as I expected.

Yanne 01.04.14 в 16:12